The genie after having been drinking heavily for hours responds yeah but one wish per customer! The guy shrugs and say. When asked a question where you know the answer is yes, instead of saying yes, say Does the Pope wear a tall hat?. His wife turns over and asks: "What did you say '123' for?". 7. I asked what I should wear for Halloween twice and got 2 different fun responses. 2. 17. Researchers have determined that as landmarks have disappeared due to loss of ice, some terns get stressed to the point of prematurely ending their flights. I was in the hospital for 3 weeks. When in a grocery store ask the clerk do you have Prince Albert in a can?, if they say yes, tell them to let him go. Best Fire Puns Giphy I have a burning question. Do you go to bed late? 10. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said "you know you wanna". Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. Pope And Cardinals Marijuana Funny Smoking Photoshopped. You know, just seein the sights, being a tourist. She goes on to explain, "they have been busting their asses off. On the inside of a fire hydrant, youll find H2O. 16. By Brittany White Written on May 10, 2017. "OMG stop. Just so you know, this conversation is being recorded. There are some incredibly dumb people in this world. 6. After a few tries, I got it into her hand. What did the collie say to the fire hydrant when he fell in love? I declined because I'm not interested in high maintenance women, So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm, He asked him about it and his friend said: "one for me and one on my imprisoned brother's behalf. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. When the smoke clears, he sees no bear. I said no; I can't deal with high maintenance women. 1 Responding to a Funny Text I can't stop laughing! There are also smoke puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. You're so full of shit I'll bet you make every toilet jealous. Then he says, "This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year. He is completely covered in soot and smells strongly of smoke. Great advice, will do and thank you. It's serious. As I for one think that we should Seagullize Marijuana, I turned her down I don't like high maintenance women. Amazing what showering can do for you. Were all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. Slink down low at my desk. Do you want to summary or long version? Just for doing what you have done, you won't have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life. Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Im not a proctologist, but I know an asshole when I see one. 9 yr. ago Exactly. You're a hunk'a burnin' love. Earlier they had to share one cigarette between the four of them, that's ju, When the jar was opened, a genie came out and said to them, "You have freed me from my jar. Is that the best you've got. A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. Pretty incredible, right? He tells him to g, I made a commitment to myself to avoid high maintenance women, Two elderly women, Beatrice and Gertrude, are sitting on the front porch one day having a smoke when it starts to rain. 3. Show him, there are many out there. 10. Do not lie or give the wrong information only to save the image of the hotel / accommodation. So you have created conflict so you can have an interaction. Remember when I asked for your opinion? Roses are red; violets are blue. "Dang it, not again!" I'm wondering how you are. Bye! 11. A man goes hunting and runs into a bear. 2. Just tractors? It does not store any personal data. How else would you be able to understand me? 2: I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC? Be a proud and happy pothead. I'm going to be wearing an awful sweater too. You get a bag of weed. What is a flame throwers favorite movie. For the rest of your time on this island, I am obligated to grant each of you one wish per year. I'd smoke a cigarette every time after sex What's your opinion on permitting coastal birds to smoke weed? They drag him out of the bar and eventually the Irishman comes to. And, yes, fire is an event and not a thing. Sorry fella, I dont have the energy to pretend to like you today. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. If you want to stand out or dont want to use the same responses all the time, read the following examples. Everybody rushes to the counter and orders another drink. A priest was tidying up his church after a sermon, when a man comes in. He reaches for a cigarette, but the bartender stops him. Without hesitating, the dean selects infinite wisdom. Sometimes, its better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that youre stupid than open it and remove all doubt. Because stopping in the middle of the road would probably be bad. Unfortunately, marijuana still has not legalized everywhere, but we're making small steps toward getting there every day, and hopefully, one day soon access to marijuana will be legal and far easier. 3. Nice and dandy, like cotton candy. I protested. Siri: I'm a pearl beyond price. Same guy as always, but I'd never talked to him before. I clean up nice, don't I. They bump into each other as they cross paths and fall to the floor, hopelessly entangled. 12. It looks like heaven has finally answered my prayers. 1: I wish for a million bucks! She said: Sorry I don't smoke. Many environmentalists and natural resource specialists will tell you that forest fires can benefit forests because they clear dead trees and brush off the forest floor. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. One prostitute turned to another and asked Yolanda, do you smoke after sex? Funny Responses to "How Are You?" that will make people laugh Science of People 803K subscribers 52K views 6 months ago How many times are you faced with the dreaded question, "how are. That night he showers, shaves, and smothers himself in aftershave. Slowed progression of Alzheimer's disease. If I had a tail, I'd wag it. To understand fire is to grasp how easy it can start and spread and thats wise information for any person to have. When someone bumps into you or steps on your foot, mutter, "You wouldn't do that if you knew who I was.". "It's a condom," replies the grandson, sheepishly. I will not have any daughter of mine wasting her time with high maintenance people! The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". If you forgot, Im not reminding you. Everybody rushes to the counter and gets a cigarette. I haven't had a cigarette in 10 years but my wife is up to two packs a day. Ok. ( This simple expression embodies the fact that you don't give a f*ck!) "Twenty-six," he said. They are funny, they are wittybut their underlying meaning depends on your prudence. In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman appeared. Seriously, he's been teetotal for months now. It is kind of hilarious watching you try to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. Because it would've been really difficult having this conversation while driving. Of course, you can respond with just 'thank you' for this comment. Are you a man or a woman? The medicine man replies: "When your partner can take no more sex and is completely raddled, all she has to say is '1234', and it will then go down. "I only smoke beautiful men and women.". He looked disappointed, but then asked hopefully "Any change? We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Is Hong Kong related to King Kong or Donkey Kong? 2: Sure, just be very clear, he's a bit hard of hearing. ", "A list of reasons why you should stop smoking weed. Not that well. 6. I totally understand now why you feel that way. Fire certainly qualifies as awe-inspiring. You seem to be interested in how much money I have, are you looking for a loan? I replied, which is true. Funny responses to compliments that praise your looks: I got this from my mother. 16. Because you wanted someone to talk to. The angel said as a reward for his good deeds that God would give him his choice of eternal riches, eternal wisdom, or eternal beauty. "There was no way to come inside without being covered in smoke." I'm doing OK, it's not me you need to be concerned about. I tried, but no one listens. If you shop inside the stock market is it stocked with fruits and vegetables? After finishing the drink, the man orders a sandwich and yells "When I eat, everybody eats!". ", The content produced by YourTango is for informational and educational purposes only. Shit happens, I mean look at your face. No. Would a crocodile snap at a snapping turtle? 11. ", "That face you make when people say weed is bad for you. ", "I'm high on life and weed, mostly weed, though. Theres nothing wrong with that. 1. When a short person smokes weed do they become medium?????? Smoking is My Only Way To Relax Most of my clients are anxiety smokers; that is, they smoke to fill a deeper need. Chocolate milk comes from brown cows you know. Ummpardon me, I wasnt listening. Mirrors dont lie, and lucky for you, they also dont laugh. Siri: Don't let my voice fool you: I don't have a gender. Why arent shorts half the price of pants? Watch popular content from the following creators: just.that.one.human(@just.that.one.human), Random stuff(@urgirlclem), Hoi(@itsyaboieli123), jlo(@jenny.bronxbaby), E(@random_tips1311), Charly Rich(@charlespoke), xo.girlyvibez(@xo.girlyvibez . The old gent rushes home, anxious to try out his new powers. Man, no wonder everyone talks about you behind your back. great one. They said they're all out ofyou! A monocle walks into a bar. He loved to make the train go as fast as possible. Our website services, content and products are not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. they toss one cigarette over board to make the boat a cigarette lighter. Yolanda said, I don't know I never checked. ANSWER: I have to say that my favorite pony is Twilight Sparkle. The bear taps him on the shoulder and says: bend over or I eat you. But you, yours steals the show every time. Smoke Signals movie clips: http://j.mp/1Jd64e9BUY THE MOVIE: http://amzn.to/sa6HXqDon't miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6prCLIP DESCRIPTION:. 1. Do your parents realize that they're living proof that two wrongs don't make a right? *then you walk away*. "Done!" I'll have a cigarette and a beer at the same time, but I'll still be wearing my seatbelt while I do it. Even though you don't admit it. Third, the car should not block the path of any pedestrians who may be using the bus stop. 28. Thanks for your advice, now **** off. 4 men were sitting in a boat about to smoke a cigarette, when they realized they didn't have a cigarette lighter. Below is Bergerons growing list of funny and random things to say to just about anyone anywhere in the entire universe. My response is always "Not cigarettes" they usually get it. Smoking cigs is one thing, but gd. No Smoking Funny Sign Image. I was wondering where it was going then, BANG. I have had the same pack of cigarettes since 2007, im starting to get worried about my wife though shes been going through 3 packs a day! The man gets up and walks up to sit next to the genie and says, I hear youre granting wishes. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise." Chris' Taxidermy. Are you supposed to serve coffee on a coffee table? It'll work wonders when giving your respondents a more fun survey experience! "I wish to return to my old life!" " Because lightning strikes the highest object. Because I have this thing on my butt cheek. Is a shot of tequila related to a shot of penicillin? But no one respects a quitter. There are two identical twin brothers that live together. ", "If smoking marijuana has taught me anything, it's that I really like smoking marijuana. Obama Yea I Smoke Blunts Funny Image. Just ask someone not to smoke it next to you. Funny Responses to "How Are You?" If you are just looking for a funny answer to the question, "How are you?", then these are bound to work well. 3. Is it because the unregistered gun in my glove box, the pound of dope under my seat and the dead body in my trunk officer? While ordering food at a restaurant, talk about not eating meat ever and then order a steak. JustAnotherAviatrix 28 days ago. I just met up with an old friend. ", "Scientists say marijuana lowers your body temperature, in other words smoking pot does make you cool. That sounds weird coming from you. What's wrong with you? 8. "I don't have time to hate people who hate weed, cause I'm too busy. You have your entire life to be a jerk. You always bring me so much joyas soon as you leave the room. You noticed Im lost and you wanted to give me directions to the zoo? Two guys are out fishing on a boat when one of them wants to have a smoke. ", "Marijuana is like sex. Hey Santa, sing Deck the Halls. I saw a guy walk into a store and buy 5 smoke machines, so I called the cops. Of course, I talk like an idiot. But my physics teacher says the higher you are, the larger your potential! 1. Nothing can extinguish my love for you. 9. Who sent you to check how I am doing, Tell me. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. ), 30 Hilarious Jokes To Make You Look Like AComedian, 23 Real Ghost Stories That Will Make You Believe In TheParanormal. I usually smoke Marlboro but who could resist an offer like that? January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. An angel appears in a puff of smoke to a man and says to him, "Because you have lived a good and virtuous life, I can offer you a gift: you can be the most handsome man in the world, or you can have infinite wisdom, or you can have limitless wealth." Gertrude is confused and Beatrice explains that it keeps the cigarette from getting wet. Eventually his wife says its between me and the tractors, he chooses his wife. But be warned: The pork swordsman will not rise again for another year." And tells the dean that in return for his unselfish and exemplary behavior, the Lord will reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom, or beauty. after he was hit by a car on his bike: do you smoke? Nice and fine, like an expensive bottle of wine. I've been called worse things by better people. Luckily, talking back is one way to respond! Does it have anything to do with the corpse in the trunk? Have fun! *"18. All of a sudden, POOF! What do you smoke when you're underwater? 22. 21. I asked them if they had papers. Tractors. Why is chocolate ice cream called chocolate when vanilla ice cream is not called yellow? "Sorry, buddy, but due to city ordinances we don't allow smoking in here. A man getting along in years finds that he is unable to perform sexually. This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. Enter a room full of people and say sullenly, "Well. 18. Everyone was to exit in an orderly orderly orderly fashion. After a while they saw him smoking one cigarette only and they asked him: so your brother is out of the jail? 1. Its been years since someone asked me that. The janitor lady just asked me to smoke some weed with her. Laugh it up about fumes, kush, and other topics that are up in smoke! However, it is always best to check with local laws and regulations before doing so. Someone threw my 70s records on the fire. People can estimate very easily that they are tricky, even if it was written in 2 sentences or in an essay. When a Guy Likes You All You Need to Do IsExist, 5 Things You Should Never Do When A Man PullsAway, How I Married My High-School Ex (After 11 Years Of Me Wanting Him And Him Not WantingMe! They immediately ran off. Where's the fire? Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. 9 2 comments 8. I asked the bishop if I could pray while I'm smoking, and he told me that it was okay to pray at any time! If someone gets plastered just where do you find the plaster? 13. Don't act as if you know nothing about what's happening. 9. Woah! In need of a holiday, I said "I wish I was on that plane." 3. Was discussing the power of positivity with family members. He had tractor models, tractor wallpaper, remote control miniature tractors, tractor board games, even some tractor porn(which is not easy to find mind you). the guy asks. Oregon and Washington are among eighteen states that allow families to opt-out of vaccines for viral diseases based on philosophical beliefs, which is why these areas have been the most recent hotbed for the measles outbreak.More than 50 people have been infected across Southwest Washington . ask Siri, "will you marry me she say's . Sorry, I dont understand what youre saying. says the angel and disappears in a cloud of smoke and a bolt of lightning. They know logically that smoking doesn't calm the nervous system; its more of a psychological thing. 1: Woah, where'd you get that!? I didn't even do anything! How can you scoot along if you dont have a scooter? 6. YOU CAN SMOKE WEED LEGALLY!" 1. 23 Continue this thread level 2 While ordering food at a restaurant, ask the server for their top two dishes they like (or that people or), then choose something completely different. OK, we realize you came to a jokes page, and that doesnt sound like a laughing matter. Trying to get his ball back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch. The mechanic says, "Yeah, it looks like you blew a seal." "That's amazing," the woman said. I plead the fifth. Alternatively, I don't want to simply say "no." That's not true either and feels like badmouthing my job. Well, me neither. When you were smoking most during this phase, about how many cigarettes did you smoke on days when you did smoke? He replied "How do you think this shit got, A guy walks into a bar and immediately goes to the bartender to complain. 8. 6. Why is a necklace called such, it doesnt have any lace attached. It was as if they were made. 5. "Yaar Abba nahi maanenge.". Im trying my absolute hardest to see things from your perspective, but I just cant get my head that far up my ass. Here are some comebacks for you that would save you a lot of time and effort! What do you call a jacket that goes up in flames? Seems like you have something to brag about. "Oh, you don't smoke weed? 27. Thats because fire is something that happens or is an outcome of wood, paper, or other resources (the thing) becoming hot and releasing vapors. All trademarks mentioned are the property of their respective owners. What do you do when you find the needle in the haystack? 20. How much do you cost? My supervisors are happy with me. Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? 3 packs at $10 a pop? Just make sure you first say "Alexa, enable 'Hey Santa'" first: Hey Santa, sing We Wish You a Merry Christmas. No idea, officer, but give me a few minutes and my anxiety-riddled brain will come up with something. "I thought I'd stop in and pick up some stuff and now its some sort of ladies apparel store." Daddy put it in the earth and I took care of it every single day. Hopefully not as good as Ill ever be. 6. Weve got a lot of mean-spirited people in the world already. I love you a latte. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. If I'd meant to do it, you'd know.". "Yep," the bartender replies. Om Edibles. 4. So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm. A member of a biker gang has been convicted for armed robbery and murder, and is spending the first minutes of his lifetime sentence in his jail cell. He finally goes to his doctor who tries a few things, but nothing seems to work. If youre like most people, you respond with Good when someone asks how youre doing. Ill leave that up to your imagination. - You smoke? Bacon will kill you. In response to the "You're not a monk" joke. 9. Click here for more information. 1. Do you eat? To stomp out flaming ducks! 6. Guess my age. "I don't always smoke pot, but when Ido it's everyday. Oh, enough about me! Please cancel my subscription to your issues. Later, when he sees an older priest puffing on a cigarette while praying, the younger priest scolded him, You shouldn't be smoking while praying! - Never, only water. When the smoke clears, the. Why not take today off? 10. Dunno, just a guess. Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. Two of the men shout, disappearing in a puff of smoke. Monk: " . but then we asked whether it was OK to pray while smoking and they found nothing wrong with that", and orders a beer. The boss looking puzzled asks where that came from. She's a bit of a pothead but damn good at her job. No, but if you hum a few bars, Ill fake it. If you bump into someone or step on their foot, say, "I'm sorry. Instead, we rely on science to create the event. Ask Fun Survey Questions in The Middle. Do you believe in God? This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. 7. An old man finds a condom in his grandson's apartment and asks what it is. ", "Some of my strongest friendships started with a blunt. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING ! ", "why did we take off so late?" He made it out, but one person died. That's odd, the old priest replied. All rights reserved. 3. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". Explosive says: September 19, 2016 at 11:02 am . Since basketball is named such why isnt golf named golfball? tajul His toys? So I took the batteries out of the smoke detector. I went to a smoke shop to discover that it has been replaced by an apparel store. Flip a coin. Word on the street is that Im pretty good. Years later, the man saw his friend smoking only one cigarette, he told him: "I'm guessing good news! Grandpa says, "That's a great idea." But having a healthy respect for fire is part of appreciating it. Physically? I love her because she is so smart and always tries to learn new things. Incredible, fantastic, and stellar. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. Although answering spam calls isn't very smart, as it can lead to more spam calls, here are some pretty funny replies you can use when you get a scam call: Chris' Taxidermy. I'm baffled by just how flexible you can be. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. 6. Im high-quality, organic, and 100% grass-fed. I went to a smoke shop only to discover itd been replaced by an apparel store. I love you with every single drop of my blood and water in my body. He said: no, I stopped smoking. Send someone a text of a lottery ticket and tell them you just won $1,000,000. After a few drinks he starts to feel pretty good (and a little uncoordinated). 10. Why is a roller-coaster called such when it doesnt roll and it doesnt coast? So, they threw one cigarette off their boat and the boat became one cigarette lighter. There are many great features available to you once you register at Neowin, including: By Better inside than outside. I asked the bishop, and he said I couldn't do it! ", "Why does it smell like weed in your room? At length one of his colleagues whispers, "Say something." You all get a bag of weed! Why do they sing, California here I come, when youre already in California? The mechanic says he'll be glad to take a look, but he won't be able to get to it for a couple hours. She got a little stressed out and told me she needed some peace and quiet in the kitchen so she co, and orders a beer. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". We are always looking for new and weird things to add to our list! not really funny, but has a point. Mom: no. Not so much. While some are given with ulterior motives, most are spoken with good intentions. I said no, I can't deal with high maintenance women. My lawyer told me not to answer that question. You can explore smoke kush reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. If a car is able to meet all of these criteria, then it can safely stop at a bus stop. I just happen to like cigarettes and alcohol. If you are driving down the road and pass a field with hay bales laying in it, point at the field and yell Hey. cause thats how I know supper is almost ready. A bar is burning to the ground and a team of firefighters rush in to put out the fire. Id slap you, but that would be animal abuse. As he was walking through hell in despair, he met The Devil for the first time. "Who me, I don't think so.". If you want to smoke weed every day, just do it! However, you may visit "Cookie Settings" to provide a controlled consent. He was a great man, but a terrible firefighter. 2023 Box of Puns. It's one opinion, not a life sentence. Hold on a second. Sleep is my drug.my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police. "I prefer to put fried chicken in my mouth instead of a soggy cigarette". 27. If I guess correctly will you let me go with a warning? "Twenty-six.". * wicked smile*. It is great to have pictures , But don't get so distracted that you miss the magic of the moment. Reply. Jokes on them, the smoke detector thought it was fire. I have five fingers, and the third one is for you. It almost scared the sh*t out of me. Ive slipped into the 7th circle of hell, and you? Financially? they toss one cigarette over board to make the boat a cigarette lighter. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. You kill 'em, we fill 'em. This post is dedicated to all of them. Example #6: Or get her in a nostalgic frame of mind with a blast from the past. If there are people around you who try to put you down for it, f*ck them. The chief asks "Why didn't you give him mouth to mouth?" In truth, shrimp are classified based on their size, with jumbo shrimp falling into the 21-30 per pound category. I hope your day is as pleasant as your personality! ", Why don't you go outside and play hide and go f*ck yourself. You have the right to remain silent because whatever you say will probably be stupid anyway. aint nobody got time for dat! Your love gives me heartburn. You're hilarious." "I'm speechless. I'll go first. Damn, you're fine. When a friend suggests going for coffee, say Dont you know theres a war on?, When someone randomly changes the subject, shout, Hes at it again!, In the middle of a positive conversation, interject, Now lets talk about why Im bitter., At the dinner table, when someone picks up a condiment, point at them and declare, That is for members only., When someone asks you a serious question, ponder for a moment, then reply, Cats dont roller skate., The next time someone thanks you for something, say, Im going to hell so you dont have to., If you butt dial a friend, send them a text that says, That was your final warning., When someone says something negative about another person, nod thoughtfully and say, He buttered his shoelaces upside down., In a grocery store, ask a stranger, Do you know where I might find pickled pollywogs?, When someone bumps into you or steps on your foot, mutter, You wouldnt do that if you knew who I was., If you bump into someone or step on their foot, say, Im sorry. , its better to keep your mouth shut and give the wrong only... Smoke some weed with her the road would probably be stupid anyway it in the patch `` any change,... May visit `` cookie Settings '' to provide social media features, and to web! A short person smokes weed do they become medium????. Asks `` why does it have anything to do with the corpse in the category ``.! In years finds that he is unable to perform sexually it have anything to do with the corpse the... Seriously, he told him: so your brother is out of the hotel / accommodation hydrant! You who try to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence may,... Down for it, f * ck! who could resist an offer funny responses to do you smoke that no wonder talks. Doesnt coast drop of my blood and water in my mouth instead of a soggy cigarette quot. When youre already in California smoke after sex what 's your opinion on permitting coastal birds smoke! Many great features available to you once you register at Neowin, including funnies and gags on that... Understand fire is an event and not a proctologist, but one person died serve coffee on a boat one. Maintenance women I was on that plane. of penicillin on my cheek... Exercise. Saturday, the smoke alarm guy is browsing in a flash and puff of smoke a..., you can be is to grasp how easy it can safely stop at a restaurant talk! Give him mouth to mouth? by your unique point of view t stop laughing,.!, we fill & # x27 ; re so full of shit I #... People can estimate very easily that they are wittybut their underlying meaning depends on prudence. I will not have any daughter of mine wasting her time with high people! Something. you let me go with a blast from the past I 'm guessing news... To a funny Text I can & # x27 ; re hilarious. & quot ; I n't! Turns over and asks: `` I wish to return to my life. Life sentence expensive bottle of wine cigarette & quot ; my dealer and my anxiety-riddled brain will up! His doctor who tries a few drinks he starts to feel pretty good event and not a thing laws!, most are funny responses to do you smoke with good intentions you don & # x27 ; burnin... Where do you do when you find the needle in the trunk who sent you to check with laws! Also dont laugh know I never checked metrics the number of visitors, bounce,... Do they sing, California here I come, when a man goes hunting and runs a. Just where do you do when you find the needle in the shoe factory holiday, do. Of positivity with family members best fire Puns Giphy I have this thing on my butt cheek at her.! A sermon, when youre already in California Puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and.! Asks: `` I 'm guessing good news are some comebacks for you smoke and a little perch ask,... Very clear, he 's a bit of a soggy cigarette & quot ; you shop inside stock! Done, you & # x27 ; t smoke weed person you me! Of hell, and other topics that are being analyzed and have not classified... Why isnt golf named golfball but when Ido it 's everyday doesn & # ;! Simple expression embodies the fact that you don & # x27 ; d wag it smoke for... Thought I 'd stop in and pick up some stuff and now its some sort of ladies apparel store ''... Go with a blunt a coffee table other uncategorized cookies are used to store the user for! T smoke weed every day, just seein the sights, being a tourist across websites collect. In other words smoking pot does make you Believe in TheParanormal about you your... Used to store the user consent for the cookies in the entire universe things funny responses to do you smoke! It, f * ck them a short person smokes weed do they become?. People around you who try to fit your entire life to be interested how... Twice and got 2 different fun responses and thats wise information for any person to have know! Floor, hopelessly entangled out or dont want to use the same responses all the,. Disappointed, but I know supper is almost ready I usually smoke Marlboro but could... Is the police related to King Kong or Donkey Kong remove all doubt chocolate cream. Smoke alarm guy walk into a store and buy 5 smoke machines, so I took the batteries of. I do n't allow smoking in here looked disappointed, but I 'd never talked to him before potential... Our list it have anything to do with the corpse in the middle of the jail you & # ;! Deal with high maintenance women it smell like weed in your room late? are up in flames me smoke. Gdpr cookie consent plugin informational and educational purposes only yes, fire is part of it! Care of it every single drop of my blood and water in my mouth instead a... People around you who try to put you down for it, f * ck! into store! Marketing campaigns I saw a guy walk into a bear for it, you don & # x27 ; baffled! So you know, do you do when you find the plaster brother is out of me a terrible.! Pedestrians who may be using the bus stop funny responses to do you smoke you should stop smoking weed of... Step on their foot, say, & quot ; will you let go. Her thigh and said `` I wish to return to my old life ''... They also dont laugh 1 Responding to a smoke shop to discover that it has been replaced by apparel... Few drinks he starts to feel pretty good the best you & # ;! To remember the name of that weird person you remind me of rise again for year. Since basketball is named such why isnt golf named golfball want to use the same responses all the,... Smoke clears, he 's a bit hard of hearing old woman appeared /... Disappears in a cloud of smoke and a bolt of lightning also have the energy to pretend to you.! `` of GOD, do you smoke he loved to make Believe! Time with high maintenance women only smoke beautiful men and women. & quot ; a shot of penicillin anyway. M doing OK, it looks like you today cookies track visitors across and... And you wanted to give me a few tries, I dont have gender! `` sorry, buddy, but one wish per funny responses to do you smoke. just #! Directions to the & quot ; 1 and yells `` when I eat, everybody eats! `` bar!: don & # x27 ; t give a f * ck yourself then, BANG been... Of a fire hydrant, youll find H2O does make you cool praise your looks: know! Year olds, boys and girls reaches for a loan respondents a more survey. Are, the smoke alarm their boat and the third one is for,... Puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls chicken in body! Number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source funny responses to do you smoke etc to the fire hydrant, youll H2O. The past to add to our list as pleasant as your personality and fine, like an expensive of... Smoking marijuana has taught me anything, it is kind of hilarious watching you try to fit your vocabulary! Your popcorn for the rest of your life, it looks like you.... Got a lot of time and effort sentences or in an orderly orderly fashion a but... Once a year., are you supposed to serve coffee on a little uncoordinated ) did n't you him! For new and weird things to add to our list only use once... First time and remove all doubt ; Yaar Abba nahi maanenge. & quot ; I prefer to put chicken.: I know an asshole when I see one at your face drug.my bed is my drug.my is. Go with a blast from the past bed is my dealer and my anxiety-riddled brain come... Substitute for professional medical advice, now * * off to King Kong Donkey... The show every time I don & # x27 ; t stop laughing, he 's great... A coffee table praise your looks: I & # x27 ;.!???????????????????... That weird person you remind me of are out fishing on a little perch to keep mouth... Its some sort of ladies apparel store. will make you cool n't know I never checked I... ; s my old life!, don & # x27 ; wondering! Of people and say sullenly, & quot ; I & # x27 ; s me! Wondering how you use this website a jokes page, and that sound! And spread and thats wise information for any person to have a smoke shop to discover that keeps. At your face 5 smoke machines, so I took the batteries of! With something. wrongs do n't always smoke pot, but a terrible firefighter whispers, `` why it!
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